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The First Stage is “Denial”
“Denial is a protective device, a shock absorber for the soul. It prevents us from acknowledging reality until we feel prepared to cope with that particular reality.… We do not let go of our need to...
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A Death Expert on His Own Deathbed: “Joy and Hope and Trust”
Two months after he died, Ernest Becker won the 1974 Pulitzer Prize for General Nonfiction for his book The Denial of Death. I guess, since he was dead, he was not a winner, but his book was. I’ve been...
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“Grace” From Prehistory to Today
“All human nature vigorously resists grace because grace changes us, and the change is painful.” Flannery O’Connor “Grace is always available to us, only we are not always ready to receive it.” Kabir...
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A Cave, A Deathbed, and “How You Made Them Feel”
“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” —Maya Angelou 1975 – Vineville Baptist, Macon, GA, youth...
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The “Comfort” of Nothingness
“When I’m dead, I’m dead.… and I just sail off into nothingness, and that brings me a lot of comfort. That doesn’t bring everyone comfort but it brings me comfort.” —Caitlin Doughty, author of Smoke...
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Halloween AND The Advent of the Cowboy
[This essay first appeared in a 1992 winter issue of Fairfacts, the newsletter of the Fairfax Nursing Center in Virginia, where Hank served as chaplain.] Photo by Ardian Lumi on Unsplash I am...
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Milestones
Let’s start with a trivia question. What do the following words or phrases have in common?: bomb, chronic disease, demonic, homework, influencer, milestone, remix, Roman Catholicism, swampland,...
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Long-distance Caregiving is Difficult: Listen to Podcast
I am the guest this week on “The Clarity Podcast” with Aaron Santmyire. Aaron is a missionary in Africa and started the podcast to help other missionaries with issues related to their work overseas....
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“God’s Child” Holding Still in Jail
“Before every person there marches an angel proclaiming, ‘Behold, the image of God.’” —Jewish Proverb It’s Wednesday. Any Wednesday. 2:00 PM. Photo by RDNE Stock project: I am sitting in silence with...
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Toby Keith Quit Chemo
“I quit chemo…and it probably did more damage to me than the cancer did….” This was Toby Keith’s feelings about chemotherapy, according to his friend Brett Favre. So, is the takeaway to never do chemo?...
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